my little mommy

not my child

For the longest time, I refused to put Evie in the nursery room at church.  I didn't have a legitimate reason; I just wasn't ready to let go.  When we finally did, the first few times were rough.  She cried and reached for me as I walked away.  I wanted to cry too.  Now, she (usually) goes in happily and eager to play with all of the toys.  And I still want to cry.

Why is letting go so difficult? 

It almost feels silly to write this about the church nursery - a place she visits only once a week for an hour and a half.  But as a mama, it is the first of many, many times when I will have to relinquish control of my sweet baby to the world.  The first of many "letting go's."  

But I was recently reminded from a more mature, seasoned mother that Evie is not truly my child.  She is, above all else, God's child.  His precious daughter.  I have simply been given the privilege and responsibility of raising her for a short time.  That's not something that I can easily accept, to be honest. I love this little girl with my whole being.  To think that she is only mine for a time is scary and painful. And yet, I am excited to see what God does with her little life.  I simply need to learn to let go gracefully.  After all, He will never let go of her.

restaurant salsa

The past two years have been my first real attempts at gardening.  We started quite small last year and expanded a bit this year.  Somehow, I ended up with several tomato plants both years even though we typically don't eat a lot of tomatoes. This year, I began looking for recipes to use up those beautiful red fruits.  

And what did I find? Salsa. We love salsa around here, so it seemed like a perfect solution.  I gathered up the eight tomatoes we had, searched pinterest for recipes, and ended up modifying a few into my own.  I'll admit, at first, I was a tiny bit disappointed with the results.  It just didn't seem quite right to me.  But when I pulled it out of the fridge today (after making it yesterday), it was so yummy.  I think it just needed time for the flavors to really steep together.  

Here's the recipe that I used.  I'll warn you, it has a bit of a kick to it.  I'd probably call it medium, but I guess that's all relative.

Restaurant Salsa:

8 ripe tomatoes

1/2 yellow onion

4 cloves of garlic

3 jalapeno peppers

small handful of cilantro (to taste)

salt to taste (about 1/2 tsp. I think?)

Directions:

Preheat oven to 375.  Cut tomatoes into halves and place on baking sheet with the insides facing up.  Peel onion, cut in half, and place one half on baking sheet face up. Cut the caps off the jalapenos (and remove seeds and membranes if you don't want it as spicy).  Place jalapenos and garlic cloves (peeled) on baking sheet with onion and tomatoes.  Roast in the oven for about 30-40 minutes.  Allow to cool some.  In a food processor or blender, blend all ingredients to desired consistency.  Taste and adjust salt and cilantro as desired.  

I personally recommend allowing the salsa to completely chill in the fridge before serving.  It will keep for about a week in the fridge, or you can freeze it! I'm not sure about canning this particular recipe because I know that tomatoes require very specific acidity levels.

Let me know if you try it and love it as much as I do! Enjoy!

what i love about you

My sweet little Evie Bean,

I can't believe how quickly you are growing and changing right before my eyes.  Your curious spirit and independent personality are showing more and more each day.  You are really starting to find your voice, too! It's amazing how much you can communicate with us, even though your language is still minimal.  

As you have grown, you have developed some adorable quirks and habits.  I don't always realize how precious these moments are because they are part of my many days with you; however, other people are always commenting on how smart and adorable you are! We can never get through the store without a stranger stopping to chat with you and tell you how beautiful you are (or how much you look like your daddy!)  

I want to remember these silly little moments with you because they are the moments that make motherhood worthwhile.  Moments pass so quickly, and I don't want to lose these precious memories.

I love the way you say hi to us when we go to get you in the morning.

I love how you stomp your little feet when you're frustrated or just being goofy with us.

I love how you say hi to everyone we pass at the store.

I love how you cuddle your tiger and your baby, mimicking the way we pat your back and kiss your face.

I love how you happily run around naked after your baths.

I love the adorable animal sounds you make! You currently know cow, monkey, pig, and duck, though you sometimes get them mixed up :)

I love how you belly laugh when Daddy bounces you on the bed, and how you immediately stand up and say, "Two!" when he's done because you want to do it again.

I love how you stand on your tip toes to reach the piano keys, and how you light up when you "play."

I love how you immediately lay on the ground when we tell you no to something you want to do.

I love the way you babble so confidently to us as if we know exactly what you are saying.

I love how you sing and dance when music comes on!

I love you so much my little bean - big as the sky!

a girl and her garden

Helping mama tend to the garden

Juicy!

The day's harvest!

Tomato seeds on Evie's chin

Sour green tomato!

the "n word"

Well, it finally happened.  Evie learned to say the word "no."

I knew it would be coming soon because she has already mastered the art of shaking her head from side to side when she is unhappy about something.  Then, a few days ago, I said to her, "Can I have a kiss?" And she simply said, "No," and walked away.

And it has been her favorite word ever since.

I actually find it to be humorous and even kind of cute because I'm not sure that she completely understands what it means.  For example, if I offer her a sippy cup of milk and say, "Do you want your milk?" she will tell me no but then gladly take it from me.  

It really amazes me how quickly she is learning and growing.  It seems like the baby days are getting further and further behind us with toddlerhood just ahead.  I love seeing her explore and try new things, but there is a part of me that misses her little baby self.  I'm excited though to watch her grow into the beautiful girl she is already becoming.