happenings

Wow, sorry for the long silence.  We've had a few busy days and a few not-so-busy days spent enjoying the beautiful sunshine.  Either way, I was absent.

Chris and I just returned from a quick two day trip to Ohio to visit the Alive Music Festival.  A small group of our students were there, so we wanted to go check it out.  It was so so hot, but I loved being outside the whole day! It sure was nice to come home to my sweet baby girl though.

*I'm not in any of these pictures because I just got a tattoo and can't swim... bummer.

three

This week, the hubs and I celebrated our third wedding anniversary. Wow! I know three doesn't sound awfully impressive, but I can hardly believe it's been that long!  

I'll be the first to admit, marriage hasn't always been a walk in the park.  Having a baby has taken the greatest toll on our marriage so far.  But, we are stronger for it.  I can honestly say that I love Chris with my whole heart.  We are better together.

Happy anniversary, love.  I can't wait to see what the future holds for our family. I love you!

decisions, decisions

Well, it looks like this last Clomid cycle is a bust. Blood work will soon confirm that. The hard part now is deciding where to go from here.  I talked to someone at our insurance company today about fertility treatments.  She told me that they are not generally covered, but that I should call back with each procedure code as they come.

So there's that.

And then the idea of adopting now was sounding really good until I started looking into some agencies.  The wait time is almost three years.  Wow.

I need direction.  Where are we supposed to go from here? Both routes have the potential to be expensive, time-consuming, and ultimately a letdown.  We need to be wise about where we decide to invest our savings, efforts, and time.

If you're a praying person, please send up a quick one for us as you think of it.

our God

Before I was pregnant with Everlyn, while we were still in the pit of infertility, there were many Sunday mornings when church song lyrics really affected me and I would begin crying.  There were several songs, but the one I remember most is the song "Our God" by Chris Tomlin.

And if our God is for us, 

then who could ever stop us?

And if our God is with us,

then what could stand against?

I remember thinking, "God is bigger than my infertility." Over and over. And I would cry in raw longing for what I did not have.

And then, there was life in me, growing sweetly.  And I would sing those same words with my hands on my belly and think, "Thank you. Oh, thank you. You are greater."

We sang that song tonight in church.  And once again, I had to force myself to let go of the battle.  It's a losing battle when I fight it on my own anyway.  So here I am, completely vulnerable, but trusting the hands of my God who holds me close.